You Are Allowed
SHAME (noun)
a painful feeling of humiliation or distress caused by the consciousness of wrong or foolish behavior.
GUILT (noun)
Feeling responsible or regretful for a perceived offense, real or imaginary.
We’ve all likely felt guilty and shameful in the context of being human. They are real experiences. But they have NO place in your experiences with food.
It is never morally wrong or foolish to eat.
What you eat is not offensive. Period.
When I hear the words guilt and shame related to food, I get very curious. I’d encourage you to be similarly inquisitive.
Is the feeling of guilt/shame your own? Or based on someone else’s story?
Is it coming from a diet culture message that places moral judgement on food choices?
How does the feeding of guilt or shame effect your eating experience? (It does. and only negatively.) this is not up for debate.
How would giving yourself permission to eat change your experiences of shame? Of guilt?
Would you suggest that someone else feel shame/guilt for eating in the same way?
You are allowed to eat.
You are allowed to enjoy.
You are allowed to celebrate with food.
You are allowed to use food to support you in coping.
You are allowed.
This May Feel Like A Lot
This may feel like a lot, so please hang with me.
I grew up with the knowledge that my mother developed skin cancer related to tanning her body, with baby oil, on Virginia Beach.
I grew up in safe communities where it was possible for me to lay in the sun, with or without sunscreen, with the desire of acquiring a tan.
For many years, I visited tanning booths.
I felt better, bronzed. I never considered the fact that I was looking to acquire the hue of a human who lived a more challenging experience than I did, based simply on the color of my skin.
I am not telling you that you are wrong for liking your skin when it is bronzed. I too, prefer a sun kissed glow. I admit that not because it’s right or wrong, but because I’m human.
AND
As a grown person, I wear sunscreen when I go outside, because I don’t wish to follow in my mom‘s footsteps. At least in a dermatological sense.
This is a responsibility that I take seriously, because it is one way that I can stack the health odds in my favor.
Sunscreen has been demonstrated to reduce the risk of skin cancer. So, because I don’t want skin cancer, I will wear it.
I know that it is summertime. And I know that beaches are open. And pools are open. And folks want to have backyard parties as though this were a regular year. I want that, too.
But this is not a regular year. We are living through a pandemic. And making a choice to gather in groups, without masks, is a dangerous one. Even if you get COVID-19, and are fine afterward, humans at higher risk, around you, may not experience your positive outcome.
We also do not know about the long-term ramifications of acquisition of this disease. You could be fine now, and very not fine later. Please be thoughtful.
This is like wearing sunscreen.
And at the end of the day, the humans who were the most vulnerable at the beginning of this pandemic, the ones whose skin tones are desirable right now, will be the ones that will suffer most significantly as this pandemic continues.
Masks have been demonstrated to reduce rates of transmission of COVID-19. So because I don’t want to spread it, I wear one.
I love you and want you to be safe.
We all need to care right now.
I Call Bullsh*t
First things first, I hope that your relationship with food is not dictated by a black and white label.
If you are stuck in this pattern, please know that your body has your back and that there is another way. Secondly, this is not a debate about caloric specificity. I don’t ask my clients to think in terms of calories, and I certainly do not.
I’m not here to debate whether or not short humans or humans with less muscularity require less fuel.
That is not the point of this post.
AND
I am fired up about this.
Forever and ever and ever, health recommendations, celebrity menus in magazines (for those of us who remember those!), and pop marketing, particularly to womxm, have suggested that caloric restriction to some number that begins with the integer ONE is adequate. This happens in eating disorder treatment, too. If that is part of your story, I hear you and I see you.
.
.
.
A few weeks ago, someone notified me about an influencer here, suggesting something similarly.
I call bullshit.
Your body needs a lot of food to function. Often it needs more than that to function optimally.
Almost always, this is more food than you’d expect.
If you’re old enough to read this, please let yourself eat. And instead of giving your favorite Instagram promoter of underfeeding props, perhaps unfollow instead. ✌️
I Am the Student
I have letters after my name that denote expertise. I have had the privilege of obtaining advanced certifications. I have relied on peer-reviewed research and clinical supervision and operated in ways that has been supported by industry standards.
And none of my schooling included acknowledgment of the whitewashing of education. None of my education, not even the courses designed to increase cultural competency spoke at all about cultural empathy. None of my education encouraged me to challenge the dramatically oversimplified, racist metrics in which we ascertain or categorize “health.” Zero parts of my clinical experience working in eating disorder treatment facilities challenged me to think beyond the Eurocentric methods in which I was providing nutrition care.
My clients are my teachers. I don’t, nor do I need, to have all the answers.
Healing is not a top-down process.
It is a collective experience.
My operating as an expert does nothing to serve the humans with whom I am privileged to engage in work with. My listening and reflecting what I hear is endlessly more important than anything I’ve been conventionally taught.
I’m busy unlearning most of that, anyway.
A big thank you to you, to my clients, for being my ultimate teachers. It is my honor that you have chosen to join me here.
You Deserve Better
This is one of the many ways that eating disorders manipulate the humans who live with them. Suggestion that because one is still functioning, and perhaps, from the outside, thriving, that things are f-i-n-e, fine.
I promise you that things can be easier than this. That the amount of effort that is required to live with an eating disorder, while also being a human on the planet, is endless. I also promise that the recovery effort will require a ton of energy. And persistence and patience and self-compassion and community and grit. And, often, this still requires less energy than living in two separate worlds.
This is not diagnostically specific.
This is not dependent on body size.
This is not racially or ethnically or religiously or gender or age-specific.
This message applies to anyone, and everyone.
You deserve better.
And that you are worth the effort.
Carbs are Awesome
Carbohydrates are awesome. Cutting carbs or following a low carb diet is a fabulous predictor of feeling out of control with or addicted to them.
Because carbs are your brain and body's primary fuel source, ALL foods, barring meat and fat, contain them.
This is very much on purpose.
The brain is wired to seek out carbohydrates if they’re in low supply. Carbs are essential for preventing blood sugar from dropping too low. When that occurs, the brain secretes messengers that drive us to consume high-carbohydrate foods, without discretion.
Food addiction research is based exclusively on starved rodents.
That’s it.
Am I saying that you might not experience a particular call for high carb foods? Particularly if they’ve been limited or have had rules built around them?
Of course not.
That’s normal.
That’s expected.
And that doesn’t need to be the end of the story. Permission to experiment with incorporation of carbohydrates, regularly, many times per day, daily, forever, granted. It’s likely that you’ll feel that you’ve messed up, that you’re doing something wrong, at the start.
This means you’re in it. Stay.
Not All Disabilities are Visible
Reminder: not all disabilities are visible.
Reminder: not all disabilities are stagnant.
Reminder: not all disabilities are present at birth.
Reminder: not all disabilities are physical.
Reminder: not all disabilities are talked about.
Reminder: 1 in 4 Americans are disabled.
When I was first moving into this disabled body, people around me would tell me not to refer to myself as “disabled.” As though naming my acquired disability, before it significantly impacted my get around, I was putting myself into a universally undesirable category.
Disabled folx can describe themselves however they wish to. I can describe myself, my body; however, I want to. You can’t offer new language for disabled folx. That is for us to define. 🤟
Compassion. Compassion. Compassion.
Compassion is key in this moment.
According to compassion researcher Kristen Neff, compassion literally means “to suffer together.“ And we are. And if you are, you are not alone.
Wherever you are, please be kind.
I’m talking with folx who have been in eating disorder recovery for years, and are noticing the disorder knocking at the door in the context of isolation and food scarcity and the world.
I’m talking with folx who have been in higher level of care eating disorder treatment, have been asked to leave programs, and/or move to virtual programming, and are being tested in a brand new way.
I’m talking with folx who have engaged in behaviors, every day, multiple times a day, since entering quarantine.
I’m talking with folx who are making incredible strides in recovery, in surprising ways, in this challenging moment.
There is no one right way to do this, in this moment.
Engaging in eating disorder behaviors won’t change this moment, and, please offer yourself compassion if that’s something you’re wrestling with. I see you.
Making progress in this moment may feel scary and, for several humans that I’ve spoken to, doesn’t seem to make sense. Moving forward despite the circumstances seems to be leaving folx feeling almost guilty. I see you.
Wherever you are, I see you and I care about you and I’m grateful that you are here.
COMPASSION. COMPASSION. COMPASSION.
#EatingDisorderRecovery #Food #Eating #Eat #weightloss #weightgain #weightneutral #allbodiesaregoodbodies #haes #recovery #sobriety #healthylifestyle #healthyfood #selfcompassion #health #anxiety #depression #haes #fatpositive #mentalhealth #love #life #wellness #well #love #covid #quarentine #dietitiananna
Because You Don't Need a Reason to Eat
Because you don’t need a reason. Eat.
Sending big love.
a .
#EatingDisorderRecovery #Food #Eating #Eat #weightloss #weightgain #weightneutral #allbodiesaregoodbodies #haes #recovery #sobriety #healthylifestyle #healthyfood #health #healthateverysize #wellness #well #love #covid #quarentine #dietitiananna
You Have Permission to Skip
Despite what you may be seeing on social media, no amount of exercise can make this moment less frightening.
If you’re feeling stressed, living in fight or flight mode, (which most of us are, to some degree) actually ENGAGING in the flight response via movement, can keep you in the stress cycle.
Am I saying that all exercise keeps people stressed? Of course not. But if your relationship with movement is unhealthy, perpetuating a practice out of stress won’t make it healthy. And might not do anything but exasperate your stress.
Clients are “arriving” to sessions feeling overwhelmed by the volume of home-based HIIT exercise routines that are espoused as critical for making it through this moment in time. Frustrated by the push-ups and sit-ups and feats of athleticism that are being featured on social media.
Comparison, in a moment calling for compassion, is good for nothing & no one.
If your well-intended friend, coach, influencer, whatever, is making you feel crummy, unfollow. Mute notifications.
Protect yourself.
If you are safe and able to move your body, that is your prerogative. But you do not need to exercise to successfully get through this long moment.
This is not forever, but how you care for yourself now will impact the future. .
#eatingdisorderrecovery #fitness #wellness #well #influencer #healthylifestyle #healthcoach #personaltrainer #nutrition #health #haes #optout #selfcare #covid_19 #quarentine #dietitiananna